From the moment she met him, she knew she
was going to fall for him. He looked so innocent and gentle. However the moment
he started talking, all those first impressions were shattered. He was so not
innocent. He was rude but at the moment she didn’t care. She was enjoying his
beautiful eyes, his eyebrows that almost form a line from one corner of the eye
to another one.
She was broken when she met him. For a
moment, he could make all the pain go away. He told her stories that she didn’t
even understand because she’s too busy enjoying his eyes. They got along.
They talked almost every day. She knew him
more and more and she wished she didn’t know some sides of him so that she
would keep admiring him. It turned out he was so broken, he was sick inside out,
he didn’t like himself, he gave up on life. Those things about him really hurt
her. Deep down inside, she wanted to help him so bad because she knew exactly
what he felt, but she was afraid, she kept asking herself “is it worth it?”.Yet
she stayed.
She eventually fell in love with him, but
fear still won. She tried so hard to make the feeling go away. She didn’t want
to feel love because it’s too soon for her. Too soon because her heart had just
been broken before. She was so afraid. Afraid of getting hurt again. Afraid
that it’s not going to work out again. She was afraid to take the
responsibility. She was afraid she couldn’t fix him.
Regardless, she felt comfortable to be
around him. After all what she’d been through, she needed someone like him,
someone carefree. Things were so confusing especially after he finally said he
loved her. She wanted to be with him, but not in the way that included hard
feelings. She liked hearing his stories with other girls but not their stories.
She liked him and she didn’t want to go any further.
One time, he finally convinced her that he
loved her. She finally believed. However, actions speak louder than words.Later
she found out he was just saying that because at the moment he felt empty,
lonely, he didn’t mean it. She should’ve known. She shouldn't have let her
guards down. She regret believeing him. She knew he was a liar, a player. Hell
he said it himself he was a player. She had faith in him, that’s why she
believed.
Later he told her who he truly was. He said
he wasn’t normal. He said he was gay and that he always had it in him and he
finally fully accepted it. He loved someone like him or at least that’s what he
said. She knew he was lying. She knew he was seeing another woman.She knew why
he didn’t just come clean to her, that’s because he didn’t want to lose her, he
needed her attention, but not her heart. Yet she pretended to not knowing. She
didn’t give a single fuck anymore. She’s done.She gave up on him.
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